Hospital

After spending time in a hospital, I found myself in the children's ward. They tell you that you're not allowed to look sad here, because the kids have so much to deal with they don't need to see sad faces too. How can you not be sad? These kids don't understand what's happening to them. You'd never know that they were sick, aside from some burns, the loss of hair, and dark circles under their eyes, they smile most of the time. In fact, if it weren't for the physical signs these children would seem normal. And even though I didn't get the chance to know these children, I still feel lucky for having spent any time with them at all.  

It's amazing how kids can either drive you crazy or make you laugh. It's never middle ground with them, you're either happy or miserable. Today I had a chance to take a break, and watch my team work with their kids. Before we went to work none of us wanted to go. We all were dragging, saying things like "why don't we just leave." I didn't mind because my child wasn't there today. But as soon as the clock struck three and the kids showed up, my team was totally different. A sudden burst of energy came through the room and I was amazed. After during our meeting I told them how amazed I was. But they all just stared and said that's how it is all the time. Maybe I didn't notice because I'm usually apart of it. But today was and eye opener. What happens when you're a parent and cannot escape? There is no set time that you have the kids and you have to be happy while they are there, because they are with you 24/7. While today was easy for me I have to say good luck to the parents out there. Because I'm certainly in no rush. 

Monday

                  What happens when a child drives you so crazy that you cannot stand them anymore? You feel like a bad person, I mean this is a children something that is ideally so sweet and innocent. However, there are certain times when this precious child acts like a total ass, and all you want to do is hit them. Obviously we cannot do that, so how to deal? Just smile and get through it that's what I say. But Monday my partner child was trying my patience. She was rebellious and loud, now I know kids aren't always easy but that day I had a feeling she didn't like me almost as I didn't like her. When it came time to read she listened intently and I thought to myself finally a break. But my brief recess was interrupted when I felt something slimy and sticky roll down the side of my cheek and down my neck. What could this be? Don't worry my partner child soon informed me that she had spit on me, laughing while she said it. As I scraped the remainder of her spit from my neck she insisted that I finish the story, and that I "wasn't a very good reader." I stared at her in disbelief as she continued to whine. I shut the book and got up from the floor. She screamed at me to finish and very calmly I said, " You can read your own book." As I walked away she yelled that I wasn't her friend anymore and that she hated me. I muttered that the feeling was mutual and went to the bathroom to wash up. 

If only for this moment

                    As spring arrive it seems that the children come out in massive numbers. People drive a little slower, watchful of the kids playing in the streets. While lemonade stands are set up and mini cars are being washed. It's the time of year where everything seems a little better, where the people seems a little happier, if only for this moment. I myself feel that it is a little easier to get up for work in the early hours of the morning. The children haven't changed, my hours are the same, but the weather truly does change something in everyone. With the sun shining extra energy seems to be pouring through me, and I can tell my co-workers feel the same. I have no expectations for these feelings to last, I know that eventually my usual mindset will kick in and getting up will not be so easy. But for now it would seem that everything is a bit more peaceful, if only for this moment. 

Growing up

    Today my partner child was playing with my hair. She suddenly stopped and started crying. When I asked her why she was crying she said through her sobs " I wish I was white." What do you say to a four year old girl who hates who she is? I just told her that she was beautiful the way she was and that it doesn't matter what color you are. How sad is it that a child is already assuming the idea that being white is better or more beautiful. In a world that is supposed to be advanced and where racism is theoretically behind us, I find myself hearing more stories of African American children having some form of preconceived notion about white people, either that they are better in some way or that people of African decent are supposed to dislike white people. Whatever the case may be one thing remains true, this country and its people have a lot of growing up to do. 

Spring Break

     Returning to work after spring break was lets be honest, difficult. But a smile was quickly brought to my face at lunchtime. After pouring their milk a group of girls raised their tiny cups and shouted cheers! The teacher and I laughed, but our laughter was brought to a halt when they jumped up and started howling "spring break!" Of course we had to tell them to stop but not before the director of the preschool saw. What are these girls exposed too that would make them act like that? I didn't even know that kids knew about spring break. I have to admit it was funnier to me than serious, but at the same time the more I think about it the more disturbing it is.

Kids

                After working overtime this week I realized that the people who are close to me are convinced that I am going to have like 9 kids. I was shocked when I heard this my only response was to say "Don't you know that the world is over populated?" They all laughed and told me it was inevitable that I would have a lot of kids. I went home and thought about this, hoping for some deep routed revelation. After hours of thinking I finally came to the conclusion that they were out of their minds. For me to have 9 kids Hell would have to freeze over first. The next day when I saw my ridiculously stupid friends I asked them why they assumed I would have so many children. "Well because you work with them" was the best answer that they could come up with. A smile came across my face as I told them my brilliant revelation from the other night. " Guys, I love working with kids but nothing can compare to the very sweet and joyful moment of giving them back at the end of the day."